Letters From The Trenches

For those faithful readers following my nanowrimo progress, here is an update. I'm going to let my characters do the updating this time. Does it help to know they talk to me sometimes? Probably not.

Dear Pathetic Being,

Could have been any more stereotyped? I end up being the ultimate bad guy in the drivel you call a novel and you decide to give me a gimp leg? Hello? I thought the point was to write something decent, MORON!!

Furthermore, I'm coming across as jealous, insecure and needy, when we both know I am in fact superior in every way. And while we're on the subject, can you get to my section of your novel please? You keep writing on and on about my sister and if you don't get around to the ultimate showdown between us, I'm going to freaking defect to Germany.

Sincerely,
The evil baddie


Dear Manipulator,

Please decide if you are writing me as if I am eight or fourteen years old. There happens to be a large difference between the mental development at those ages. Yet, you have me "playing fairies" with my "best friend" while using vocabulary that would have stumped an adult of my era.

Wasn't this supposed to be a Young Adult novel? I thought you did some research or something.

Sincerely,
The youngest sister


Dear God,

Yes, dear god. As in dear god, what have you done to me? 13,000 words and I am still a nebulous blob in your head with almost no development? I have so far appeared distantly in a few scenes as a stand-offish character with almost no interaction except to be picked on by my sisters.I hear you don't have any romance lined up for me.

WTH? You mean I get stuck marrying the arrogant prick good old pops picked out for me? COME ON!!! Can't there at least be an interlude with a hot bodyguard or something?

Sincerely,
The nebulous blob in your head